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On Nov 2nd at about 1:00pm our baby Gordon Hector Wallace was born straight into the arms of God. He was a big, beautiful baby boy, weighing 10lbs 3ounces. Jennifer endured over 30hours of very hard labour, but is now doing very well.
We held a small family funeral service in the hospital chapel on Friday afternoon. Although there were tears, and although this was difficult for everyone, it was healing and a part of saying goodbye to our son. We know many of you were there with us in spirit.
There are no rules for grieving, and many of you may not know how to speak with us, but please do. If this is just about our sorrow, and we don’t allow others to hurt with us, there is so little meaning in it.
Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. It is helping us greatly to know that there is so much support for us during this time. We will have much to face in the next while, but we know that God has both us and our baby surrounded by love right now.
We love you all.
John and I wrote this message to be read to our church congregation today...but it applies those reading this blog as well. We will hurt and we will heal. As we live each day we already have wonderful reminders in our home telling us how and why we will get through this.
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30 comments:
Dear Jennifer and John,
my heart greatly grives for you and your loss. I just can imagine how you must feel now and I am sure there are no words to fully express it. But you are surrouned by your families and friends who will support, love and pray for and with you.
Please know that I and my family send out our love and prayers to you. We hope you will be better soon and that there will be laughter soon in your house.
With Love,
Andrea
We really hurt over this.
I mean that.
Usually I take dreams pretty seriously. Not always literally, but seriously.
About 2 months before Ivan was born I had a dream that I was playing a song in a service for the funeral of a son of mine who was about 2 or 3. It was that song by Clapton "Tears in Heaven" (or something like that) that he wrote for his 4 year old son who died.
In the dream I couldn't make it through the song.
I woke up crying and that dream scared me for a while. No idea why I had it.
All of this has re-reminded me of that.
Thanks for your strength and for "making it" through the rest of the song.
oops, that was angela baggett
Our hearts are so heavy for all of you and you and your family will continue to be in our daily thoughts and prayers.
Lots of Love & prayers, Sharon(&Bob)
I don't know much or how to say the right words, but I tried to anyway on my blog. I love all three of you so much. Jenn you have always been a sister to look up to, John the brother I've never had but a strong pillar in the life of my sister, and to Gordon, though I don't know you yet, I look forward to knowing you for an eternity.
There has not been a day or hour when you have not been in my thoughts or prayers. You are both so dear to me.
Thank you for sharing from your heart with us and for the pictures. They mean a lot to us. Although we can not know all you are going through, we share your deep pain and sorrow. You are not alone in your journey through this grief or this life. Many stand with you and while this does not at all take away the hurt, may you find some comfort in knowing our love for you and for your baby.
That was Angela Baggett
posted 1:43pm
Thank you for sharing. I had heard about Gordon going to be with Jesus before the weekend, but it so great to hear how you both are doing.
I have posted the words to a song on our blog that has been in my head since we heard of the grief you must be dealing with. I hope they bring you comfort. Read the words if you have a moment. Better yet, listen to the song if you have it.
Love you guys. Praying with you through all of this.
I'm so sad we didn't get to meet Gordon on earth. But I'm thankful you are healthy. Lots of hugs,
Amber
Dear Jennifer and John,
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. My heart hurts for you; you have passed through my mind and my prayers many times over the past few days. We prayed for you today in our house church here in Mexico City and my prayers continue.
Jenn, my memories of you from Western are of a strong, faith filled woman of God. It is apparent that He has continued to walk closely with you. May He give you peace, comfort and strength in His abundance over the next days and months.
Thank you for sharing your very personal pictures of Gordon. I thought it was such a beautiful image with the words you used that "our son was born right into the arms of God." And thank you for your great faith in Christ and in the eternity where your precious son awaits you.
With love,
Carolyn Brednich (Wiebe)
Our thoughts and prayers are with you both and your families. May God's peace and comfort surround you. Love Ray and Ellen
Our Dear Precious Ones,
How we love you, how we long to be by your side this very moment. May the Lord sustain and keep you and fill your hearts with His perfect peace that surpasses all understanding. May He wipe away our tears and heal our broken hearts. Our precious little one will forever live in our hearts. We love you so. All our love and prayers. Scott and Mano
My heart aches for you. I can't begin to imagine your loss. You are in our prayers! May you find peace and healing in the Lord.
With love,
Selena (Bell) Tyndall
We have been crying with you and sharing our prayers for you. Sending our love and sympathy.
Dear Jenn and John,
I was paralyzed with sick ache and dread when I received Bob's email and then saw your blog. I've been exactly where you are now and I'm so desperately sorry you are going through this agony. I am thankful you know the Lord and that He will comfort your broken hearts in tender ways over the unfolding months. You've dominated my thoughts and prayer times since Nov.2. Your family photos are beautiful...sweet baby Gordon, you will always be loved and thought of by your mommy and daddy and so many others.
Hurting with you, praying for you,
with love,
Rebecca McMillan (Tucker)
I can't begin to imagine the hurt you must be feeling now. Your in my prayers in this hard time.
Kathy Bell
You are lifted in prayer, from a heart hurting along with you- but confident that God's presence is surrounding you in a special way.
Love to you,
Harmony
Dear Jenn and John,
You have been in my thoughts and prayers in the last few days as my heart has hurt for you over this loss - I'm so sorry that you have to go through this. Your pictures are so beautiful here, both the ones of your little family and the ones of the reminders in your home of how the Lord will help you through this time.
Jenn I have always adored you - your gentle faithful heart as a friend and as a sister in Christ, and now as a mother of a sweet baby boy Gordon - how I wish you could have held him longer. I have been reminded once again how precious life is, and how fleeting. Thanks for posting these thoughts on your blog.
God bless you and your family, my friend.
Sending you my love,
Bonnie (McM) Baxter
Jennifer and John,
Robin, Dad and I were all very sad to hear the news of your little son. I wish that we could be physically closer to you both at this time so that we might do anything in our power to help you. Perhaps, there is nothing more that we could do than let you know that we love you and you are in our thoughts and prayers. A prof. of mine once said that the best words he was given when he lost someone was "I hope you have a boring year." So in light of the past few months, I hope you have a boring year.
Love Always,
Sarah (Robin & Uncle Duff)
Jennifer & John,
Like many have said, we don't know what you are going through and we don't know what to say to you that would be a light of encouragment at this time. Please know that people from all over the world are grieving with you and lifting your family up to the Lord at this time. Though I know it must have been hard to post comments to your site or even pictures of your lovely, precious family THANKYOU for doing that! We'll continue to pray for your peace & comfort from the Lord.
Sincerely, Paul, Crystal (Elford), Brooke & Bryson Quilliams
You have our thoughts and prayers.
Tim & Tara McMillan
Dear Jennifer and John,
I am very sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine the pain you are going through but my heart is aching along with yours. Thank you for sharing with everyone here. You will continue in my thoughts and prayers.
With love,
Pamela
Dear Jennifer and John,
I am very sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine the pain you are going through but my heart is aching along with yours. Thank you for sharing with everyone here. You will continue in my thoughts and prayers.
With love,
Pamela
Jen and John, I am sitting here in tears right now and I want you to know that I love you guys and I am praying for you. Your faith is an inspiration to me! Gordon is definately in the hands of God right now but he will be in our hearts forever.
I'm sending you lots of big Rhian hugs to both of you!! You both have been in my heart, thinking so much about you and Gordon for the past few days. All my love.... XOXOOX RHI RHI
You are in our thoughts and prayers always.
In HIm,
Cyrus, Kristi(Close) and Connor Crook
Jennifer & John,
Oh how I love you! I am praying for your hurting hearts! for God to surround you with his presence and comfort and healing! I wish I could hold you and just be still! I love you guys and will keep praying. With a huge hug, love and many prayers, LaVonne and Kerry
My dear dear Jennifer,
I don't have the words to say but these are the thoughts of my heart.
Your pain I don't know and I don't have,but I know mine and it is in every sinew of my body.
I could not have expressed my sorrow had I loss Andrew,You or Angela;Ivan or Dominique. Yet at the end of the day I would still have others to love hold and caress.
For you even after nine long months of diligent work and preparation you are left with no one now in that capacity now. Your pain has to be greater and deeper than all of us put together.
Nevertheless take courage and hope my child knowing that all along God has always wanted our best. For you it is your first fruit picked straight from your womb unblemished and pure;laid out at the altar of Jesus feet.
Now Gordon Hector is sitting on Jesus's knee with all the other millions of children listening to the words of their master.
Can you just picture him,nestled down wraped in the arms of Jesus.
My prayer for you is to be strong in the Lord dear. Gordon will be there holding you up in high esteem for the rest of your life.
Foever loving Mom.
When I held Gordon in my arms shortly after he was delivered, it was hard to understand how he was so still. He felt so substatial and looked so peaceful and handsome it was a poignant moment that I will never forget. He will always be a reminder of how tenuous life is and that there is a more permanent one waiting for us. May God's blessing be poured into you and John and may we all get over the ache of Gordon's loss.
Nov 1/07
Our dear Gordon.
A year today that we knew of your fate in this life. How hard it had been for us, but yet we have been able to remain strong and keep our hope because we have faith and trust knowing where you are could not have been a better place.It is only hard for us not seeing your eyes or your smiles, not hearing your laughs,watching you crawl, or even walk; yet we remain with fervor knowing some day we will see you in God's Glory.
Tomorrow your birthday you would have been a year old on this earth: I wonder how old are you now in heaven? We will leave that for another time.
Miss you grandma R,
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